Sunday, September 04, 2005

I will try to fix you??


I think somebody is trying to tell me something... A few thing have come across my path today to urge me to consider how I react to a problem or difficulty. One of the songs that has been going around in my head over the last little while has been the song "Fix you" by Coldplay. As I was looking at the lyrics I wondered whether it trying to fix something is the best thing to do in the face of a problem. Some of the lyrics go like this:

"When you try your best but you don't succeed When you get what you want but not what you need When you feel so tired but you can't sleep Stuck in reverse When the tears come streaming down your face When you lose something you can't replace When you love someone but it goes to waste could it be worse? Lights will guide you home and ignite your bones And I will try to fix you"

I think this is how I always react when Vanessa has a problem or is going through a hard time. I just want to fix it. She always tells me that she doesn't want me to fix it, she wants me to feel what she is feeling, and to relate to her. That is hard for me, because I always want to just fix it.

I was also reading an article today by Albert Mohler, who is the President of Southern Baptist Theological Seminary. He was being interviewed about how Christians should respond to tragedies such as Hurricane Katrina. He said:

"I think the first thing we have to do is to weep with those who weep. And this is not a tragedy that is over. It continues to unfold. And so right now, there are people who do not know where their wives and husbands and children are. They have no idea what their future might be. They have no idea if there's even a home to which they can return. Some of them already know they have lost loved ones, and some of them have not even been recovered, in terms of bodies. So there's an appropriate Christian response to weep with those who weep".

He then goes onto say how we also need to help practically through finances, etc. But the point I am getting at is that he first tells us to "weep with those who weep". I think there is a generally feeling in people that we just want people to understand us first and foremost. Don't try to fix me, just understand me. I think that is something I need to work on as I try to grow as a husband and as a person.

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